Sensual Massage: Pussy Massage

Pussy massage can be a life changing experience.

For the giver:

A couple of tips if you’re going to be giving the pussy massage:
Slow steady strokes are almost always a winner. It’s usually even
slower than you might think.
Really tune in to your partner that’s receiving the massage and really
feel her body. Be totally present with your strokes. Be present in your hands. Be present with her. She’ll be able to feel it. It will make a really big difference in her experience.
There is going to be a point at the massage where you may penetrate her with your fingers or you may not. So, one of the things that is so important to learn about pussy massage is never expect that you
can just put your fingers inside of her. Sometimes her body is going to be asking for penetration and sometimes she just won’t be in the mood or it won’t be right. One of the most healing gifts you can offer a woman is that choice. Women have often been penetrated way
too much, way too early and way too often. The opportunity to keep receiving the massage on the outside of the vulva can be so healing, so beautiful, and so enriching.
I’ll guide you in the audio to hold your finger right at the entrance
of her vagina and not push. Sense whether her body wants it. Ask whether she wants it and if she doesn’t you can actually just go back and redo the whole massage on the outside of her body all over again, there’s no need to penetrate. It’s really feeling into what her desire is within the massage. You’re listening to her body and not pushing her.
Don’t think you have to get her to an orgasm to give her a really great pussy massage. The beauty of pussy massage is allowing her to feel, to feel her pleasure, to have whatever experience she needs to have. Sometimes that might be seven orgasms, sometimes that might be feeling very little at all. This might also create a healing response for her. So, she may need to cry, she may need to scream, she might have old issues, emotions, memories from inside the vagina might surface in the healing massage. What is amazing is to just hold space for her. If you’re not sure what to do, if she’s crying, if you’re not sure what to do if she seems really upset, you can always ask her.

One of the best questions is: “What do you need right now” or “How can I support you through this?”. She might just need to be cuddled. She might need you to keep holding her. She might need you to continue the massage. You can really figure this out together as a couple.
Let this massage be organic. You can always do your own thing, feel into what she might need or if she is really excited about a certain touch you can stay with it and you can always pause the video.
Tune in and let the massage flow. This is all about the awakening and support of her body and her vagina. As much as possible don’t take her experience personally. Just keep being really present to whatever her body needs to experience our needs to feel.
For the receiver:

If you’re the one receiving this for massage all you need to do is feel, just feel, feel, feel, keep dropping into your body.
One of the big things that women can face when receiving pussy massage is judgment. You might want to judge yourself: I’m not feeling enough, I’m not orgasmic enough, I am not this enough or maybe I’m too orgasmic, I am feeling too much right.
What I recommend is everything is perfect. Your body is perfect, whatever you’re feeling is perfect, your sensations are perfect. The more that you can love your experience, love your body and just keep feeling whatever you’re feeling-- the pussy massage is going to do it’s great work and it’s going to restore you to this amazing capacity for incredible orgasms, amazing capacity for pleasure and amazing capacity to have extremely sensational sex.
• When you receive the massage, tune into your body, feel the sensations inside your body. Remember that this massage is just to allow you to feel deeply. There is no need to orgasm. There is no need to even push yourself to feel pleasure. Whatever arises inside your body is completely okay.

Setup

The giver will set up the ritual space:

Put the blanket down on the bed.
Set up a pillow for her head.
Place a pillow underneath her buttocks which will lift her pelvis up
and give you greater access to her vagina.
Have the oil or the lube close by because you’re going to use plenty of
it during this massage.
Put a pillow down for yourself to support you where you’re sitting
between her legs. You want to find the position that’s most comfortable to you, and you can change throughout the massage if you really need to. The point is for you to be as comfortable as possible.
Once you’re seated between her legs you can sit with your legs crossed, or you can have them straight, or whatever feels most comfortable to you. If sitting like this is really uncomfortable for you or you have back issues, bring a chair up to the edge of the bed and go ahead and sit on that for the pussy massage.
The receiver will be either totally naked if it feels amazing, or if it’s cold for some reason or makes you more comfortable, you can just have your bottoms off. Choose what feels right and then lie down on the bed.
• Finally, if you want to play music in the background you can have that cued up as well. Go ahead and press play on that, but make sure that it’s not so loud that you can’t hear my instructions at the same time.

Once everything is setup you can begin the massage.

Step 1:

Start by placing one hand over her vulva and one hand over her heart. Invite her to take three deep full breaths all the way into her pelvic floor with a slow relaxed exhale.

Take a moment to really look at her vulva, her vaginal lips, her clitoris, her pubic area. This may be really vulnerable for her. Take her in, really see each part of her.

Step 2:

Now let her know three things that are beautiful about her vulva. This can be the color, the shape, anything about the hair, anything that you love.

Step 3:

Now and cover your hands in oil and make sure you warm it up between your hands first. Begin applying this with flat palms, sweeping from her hips all the way up to the center of her chest, to the top of her breasts and around the outside of her breasts, and back down towards her hips.

Keep repeating this movement slow, super slow with medium pressure and if you need to apply more oil then do that. Your hands should be sliding easily across her skin.

Step 4:

Apply more oil to your hands and start giving her a breast massage. Use
firm hands, but not too hard, and with smooth grounded stroke around her breasts, stroke down on the outside of the breasts up on the inside, focusing the massage on the outer tissue of the breast. Make sure to go slow, slow. Apply a gentle deep pressure when you stroke her breasts. Be sure to ask her if she likes the pressure and then if she likes the speed, and adjust if necessary.

Step 5:

Then reverse the direction, going up on the outside of the breasts, down on the inside with the same slow, slow steady pressure on the breasts.

Step 6:

Using your center three fingers from both hands, do gentle soft strokes around the areolas. Don’t touch the nipples just sweep in circles around the outside of the nipples with your three fingers.

Step 7:

Apply more oil to your hands. Place your hands with flat palms on her hips, run your hands together down her pelvis and inner thighs with your thumbs lightly passing over her clitoris and vaginal lips, then swing your hands around the top of her thighs and back up the outside of her thighs, back to her hips.

Keep repeating this circular motion smooth, slow, and steady.

Step 8:

Start from her hips again and slide your hands one at a time down her pubic bone over her clitoris and down her vaginal lips towards her butt. You want firm but pretty light pressure.

Keep repeating this motion alternating hands one after the other with a slight crossing motion.

Step 9:

Now trace both thumbs from back towards her buttocks along her outer vaginal lips up towards her clitoris, again smooth, steady, and slow strokes.

Step 10:

Place one palm over her entire vulva making sure that it’s cupping over her clitoral bulb and then place your other hand on top of that first hand, press in gently and make slow circles in one direction.

Switch the direction of the circles.

Step 11:

Cupping her pubic bone with one palm, you’re sliding the hand gently down all the way towards her buttocks, then cup with your other hand in the same motion--alternating one hand after the other, sliding from her pubic bone, down her vaginal lips, all the way towards her buttocks.

Step 12:

You may need to ask her to open her legs a little wider at this point, then bring your thumbs down to her perineum, the area of skin between her vagina and her anus, and slide one thumb after the other rhythmically over the perineum. Be sure to check in whether she likes the pressure and whether she likes the speed.

Step 13:

Placing your thumbs at the bottom of the vaginal lips alternate sliding each thumb up towards the top of the lip, massaging the entire outer lip.

Step 14:

Use your flat palms, right hand then the left hand, one after the other repeat the crossing motion from before, moving your hands from her pelvic bone over her clitoris and vaginal lips down towards her butt with luscious, smooth, loving movements.

Step 15:

Very gently pinch with your index finger and your thumb on the outside of her vaginal lips, right below her clitoris on the upper third of her vaginal lips. Slide your fingers off of the lips alternating hand, one after the other, with a gentle sliding stroke. Check in with her to see if she likes the pressure and if she likes the speed.

Step 16:

Cup her clitoris with the palm of one of your hands,then do gentle slow circles with the palm of your hand. You can add the other hand on top to the circular motion.

Step 17:

Take the index finger of your dominant hand and bring it right to the entrance of her vagina, don’t penetrate or go inside her, just place your finger there.

Then cup her clitoris and her pubic bone again with your other hand and do gentle soft circles over the clitoris. You just want your finger at her vaginal opening to be an invitation. It’s really important to read her body. You’re not trying to penetrate her. Just inviting her body to open. Feel if her vagina is open and ready to be penetrated by her finger.

When she’s ready for penetration her vagina will pull your finger inside. She may signal to you by thrusting her hips, or moaning, or if you can’t tell you can ask her directly, “Would you like me to put my finger inside of you now?” If she’s open to the penetration, begin very slowly sliding your finger in and out of her body about a half inch at a time, while keeping your other hand cupped and circling around her clitoris.

Your finger is not coming all the way out of her vagina. It’s staying inside of her, just a gentle, light, back-and-forth motion right inside of her vagina.

If she says no or she’s not feeling it, you have two different options:

You can ask whether she would like to complete the massage now - or
If she want’s to you can do all the previous steps again and massage
the entire outside of her body again up until this point.

Either option is really beautiful for letting her trust that she doesn’t need a forced penetration, she’s going to be loved and held no matter what she’s feeling.

If she is desiring penetration keep bringing your finger in and out slowly. Light pressure towards the roof of the vagina, and cupping her clitoris and circling with your other hand.

Step 18:

Check in and ask whether she likes the pressure, whether she likes the speed and whether she likes the stroke or she would prefer something different.

At any time during the massage you can pulsate your other hand cupped over her clitoris, or move it in circles to give her clitoral stimulation during your strokes.

You can also ask if there is another movement that she might prefer more. What kind of stroke over her clitoris feels best to her? Periodically do this throughout the massage with your other finger inside of her.

Step 19:

Now gently massaging with your finger inside of her in semicircles around the inside of her vagina. If her vagina is a clock, you’re doing a semi-circle of light pressure around one side: from 12 o’clock to 6 o’clock.

Then switch and do semicircles of light pressure on the other side: from 6 o’clock to 12 o’clock.

Keep switching back and forth doing a semicircle from 12 to 6 and then another semicircle from 6 to 12. This may bring up emotions. Let her express and feel whatever the stroke brings up.

Step 20:

Slide your finger a little deeper inside of her but not too deep, just a little bit. You’re going to begin to feel for a G-spot. This is on the roof of her vagina, the side facing her belly, not the side towards her spine, and every woman’s G-spot is different.

You are looking for something that feels ribbed like a walnut or the ribbed part of the roof of your mouth, which could be very close to her vaginal opening. This is where most women’s G-spot is, or it could be deep inside of her. If you don’t feel it close to her vaginal opening, slowly feel deeper and deeper inside of her, up to a whole finger length inside. Some women don’t even have a pronounced G-spot. If you don’t feel anything just ask her where your touch feels the best.

You can check in with her and ask, “Does this feel good? Does this feel like the Spot?” Being aware that sometimes pressing on the G-spot can give her the sensation of needing to pee or even bring up strong emotions or discomfort.

Step 21:

Now slide your finger in and out gently across her G-spot up and down with the pressure she likes. You don’t want to pull your finger all the way out of the vagina. You want slow, smooth, gentle movements keeping your finger always inside of the vagina.

Check in with her about whether this feels good, whether she likes the pressure, whether she likes the speed, whether she likes the stroke and adjusting to her desires. Remember you can keep stimulating the clitoris with your other palm at the same time that you’re stroking her G-spot.

Step 22:

With your index finger, make circles around the outside tissue of the G-spot, lightly penetrating in and out in a circular motion.

Remember to check in, asking her does she like the pressure, does she like the speed, does she like the stroke and adjusting to her desires.

Step 23:

Now make a diagonal motion back and forth with your finger across the G-spot several times, then switch to the other direction almost like stroking back and forth on each line of an X.

You can ask if she likes the pressure, the speed, and the touch, changing to meet her desires.

Step 24:

Go back to stroking just straight in and out, and begin pressing a bit harder. Check in to see if she likes the pressure while using your other hand to cup and stimulate her clitoris.

At this point if she’s had an emotional release or a strong orgasm you can actually just hold your hands and fingers steady, holding her vagina very still. On the other hand, if she’s very turned on or still open to simulation keep stroking and checking in with whether she likes it.

Step 25:

Now stimulate her A-spot. Go ahead and insert your finger deeper into her vagina, still in the upper vaginal wall, you’re going to gently feel for her cervix. This will feel like the tip of a nose sticking out from the back of her vagina.

It can be intense to be touched on the cervix, so be very present with her body. You can make a circle with the pad of your finger around the soft tissue of her cervix. Then bring your fingers to the top of her body, pulling your finger about half an inch back towards the entrance to her vagina. This is about where the A-spot is. Just feel and explore with your finger to see if any spot or stroke feels particularly good to her.

It can feel nice in this area to stroke your finger straight in and out with pressure, deep on the top wall of the vagina. Keep exploring and seeing how she feels. What kind of pressure, speed, and stroke she likes.

Step 26:

Press you finger all the way inside of her vagina and now going to make slow, deep circles around the cervix, so you should be pressing your fingers deep into her vagina again to reach her protruding cervix. Massage all the way around the cervix but not directly on the top of it.

This can be a deep healing and strong emotional experience. Encourage her to breathe and feel her body and allow whatever comes up as you keep massaging around her cervix.

Step 27:

Begin stroke your finger back and forth on the top of the cervix. Check in with her. This may feel painful or it may be pleasurable. She might need to cry or scream or it might feel absolutely exquisite.

Keep checking in with her to see if she likes the stroke or would like to go back to one of the other strokes around the cervix, offering any different clitoral stimulation with your other hand.

Step 28:

Stop the movement of your finger on or around her cervix and just rest the top of your finger lightly at the end of her cervix, watching out for your fingernails. Keep your other hand motionless cupped over her clitoris and pubic bone and just sit in silence with her.

This is one of the most powerful points in her entire body. Just hold her perfectly still with total presence on the tip of your finger and her cervix.

Step 29:

Stay perfectly still and totally present with her body, and now let her know that you’re going to slowly remove your finger ever so slowly, bit by bit. Take this in slow-motion and move your finger all the way out of her vagina.

Keeping one hand over her pubic bone you’re going to cup your other hand around the entrance to her vagina, holding her here in silence, letting her body rest.

Step 30:

Go ahead and gently remove your hands and you can check in and see if she wants you to sit by her side, or let her integrate on her own, whether she would like to be cuddled or kissed.

Step 31:

Check in with how she’s feeling. Take time to share what you experienced, what you felt during that massage, and to listen without any agenda or judgement to what your partner experienced.